


the last word (but never the first)

by sora-esque (parkadescandal)



Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: 358/2, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-19
Updated: 2020-03-19
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:28:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23220232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parkadescandal/pseuds/sora-esque
Summary: They say there are echoes on the island.
Relationships: Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	the last word (but never the first)

“How much could I give?” the boy asked of him, surprisingly even in spite of his storm into the basement—not a breath out of place, not yet. “Would it be enough?”

“It is inadvisable,” DiZ said, choosing not to look up from his monitor. 93%. As it had languished for days. Each poke and prod and scenario run provided the same conclusion, and there was little other recourse. He braced himself for the unthinkable, and then he thought it—for the other possibilities remained somehow more unfathomable. In his periphery he saw as the boy tensed, determined, in that bullheaded way DiZ knew so intimately well, then evened his nerves with a nervous tic tug at his blindfold.

“If all you need are memories…” he started, still tugging taut the tourniquet to his bleeding heart, but trailed off. DiZ paused, allowing what respect he could to the flagellation—this act of repentance he did not yet comprehend, but with patience he was well-acquainted.

“Go on.”

“All the important things. I’m willing to bet I have them all. If it mattered at all, I already know it. …At least to a certain point. If I was already there for every memory, then there’s no reason why I can’t be the one to give them up, too.”

“You in turn would be forgotten.”

“I already have been,” he said with bite. “At least this way it’s good for something.”

“And for what purpose is that?”

DiZ heard him scoff, then steady his voice.

“To atone, maybe,” he said, not nearly so bitter as expected. “…It’s an easy choice. If anyone should have to disappear, it ought to be me. It’s a fair price to pay. I didn’t want this, anyway. So why should it keep me?”

DiZ looked up at him then, crossing his arms across his chest to find the boy staring down. Would he himself had been talked out of the single-mindedness what propelled him here? Something gave him cause to doubt, but the compulsion to goad him into the alternative remained. Foolish—a funny and fickle thing, that fate which trapped them both.

“To scorn the mold that shaped you. Is it egoism, I wonder, or the inverse? To think you are anything outside a cog of its mechanics, to take that decision unto your own. You think you play at deity.”

“ _Deity_ ,” he repeated, shaking his head for a moment. “If only. I _broke_ the mold. Destroyed it, really. It’s what I’m best at.”

“And you think that you can rebuild?”

“I think it’s too late for that, but… I didn’t leave as much of a legacy. At least let me destroy that too while I’m at it.”

DiZ shook his head.

“As you are so intent on it, I shall do nothing to impede. Though do not misconstrue that as my sanction. There are far greater ways in which you could serve the people of your homeland.”

“Greater ways I can be _used_ , maybe. But for my people…” He shook his head, voice fallen low. “No. I don’t have a people. Not plural. And what I could even do isn’t a fraction of what he can. For everyone. So I’m giving it to him.”

“Foolhardy, and insolent, to give up so much of yourself when other options remain to be tested. To destroy _yourself_ , without bearing the fruits of your labor. For what purpose could you be so selfish?”

Though he knew, had known and would know what drove a body to the breaking point, well past even the thoughtless shell of revenge and anger and pride. He could see it now falling over the boy’s frame like so much debris.

“Imprudent child. Such idiocy—is it love?” And it was so abundantly clear then—the only sound one could hear amidst it all. “Do you love him?”

The boy’s chest heaved at the weight of it, at the fear of the first opportunity to unchain such sordid truth, and in it DiZ was reminded of another such thing he knew so well as patience.

“I do,” he said, so softly, like a shadow, like an echo.

“And for this you would give yourself up—I will not deny it a noble cause.”

“So let me do it. And answer my question. Would it work?”

“…It would be near sufficient. But not all—while you may expedite the process by making up the difference in shared experience, the process requires the pieces that were stolen. You, young man, were not one of them. In fact, were there one element that remained steadfast, it was the memory of you. The witch seemed unsurprised.”

“She’s got her work cut out for her.”

“All the same, you must still bring her the missing links—it won’t be enough just to have your presence scrubbed from his memory. Though your solution may save more than just time.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll find the Nobody. And the girl.”

“See that you do, and make haste. There is little time remaining.”

“Any other errands while you’re at it?”

DiZ’s mouth turned to a bitter smile. He shook his head with a thread of mourning. 

“None which you could complete on my behalf.”

“I can’t… stop thinking about the other boy.”

“Hm?” Selphie turned to look at her, amused.

“The other boy who lived here too,” Kairi said, finding herself at a stop. She closed a hand in front of her, and looked at it for a fleeting moment as if to organize her thoughts. “We were all friends. Me, and Sora, and him. Don’t you know who I’m talking about?”

“I really don’t,” she said with a frown. “You’re kind of worrying me. I mean, I know you miss him, but—”

“You don’t believe me, do you? I promise, I can feel it. It's like I can still hear his voice. The both of them, together.”

“Kairi—”

“You know what? Never mind.” She turned to give Selphie a weak smile. “Maybe it’s not something I’m meant to figure out.”

“Whatever you say,” she said, walking ahead, leaving Kairi just one last moment to look upon the weighted wind.

“I’m sorry,” she mouthed, letting it pass right through. “Maybe one day they’ll know too.”

Once more the breeze took those echoes on the island, spread thin but strong holding so much afloat; she dispersed the thoughts once more into the sky and jogged on to catch up, to leave them behind.

**Author's Note:**

>  _“Not so,” he said; “I will die before I give you power over me.” All she could say was, humbly, entreatingly, “I give you power over me,” but he was gone. She hid her blushes and her shame in a lonely cave, and never could be comforted. Still she lives in places like that, and they say she has so wasted away with longing that only her voice now is left to her._ [[X](http://mscerdasenglish.weebly.com/uploads/8/3/7/2/83721436/azmertit_reading_passages_2.pdf)]


End file.
